Our speech is indicative of what we believe. Jesus said in Matt. 15:18 "But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man.” Your heart is revealed by your speech. There used to be a saying that I heard when I was growing up, which was the way to a man’s heart is through his mouth. I guess that was an inducement to young ladies that if they wanted to land a husband, they needed to be able to cook a good meal. I think that sort of thinking is out of vogue now. Nowadays, they just need to know how to text some nice restaurant and they can have it delivered.
But what Paul is indicating here in this passage before us is that which is in the heart comes out of the mouth. And if we have a new heart, since we are a new creation in Christ, we should be characterized by a new type of speech.
James speaking of the speech says in James 3:11 “Can a fountain send out from the same opening [both] fresh and bitter [water?]” Our new lives ought to reflect a new way of speaking, a new pattern of speech. And so this brief section of scripture here at the end of this little epistle is about this new speech that we should have in this new life we have in Christ.
Now there are four patterns of speech, or four areas of speech that Paul talks about here which should be emblematic of our new life in Christ. And the first is what we might call the speech of prayer. That’s found in vs 2, “Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving.” Prayer should be the primary element in our speech as we live out this new life in the Spirit. Prayer is spiritual communication with God. And if we are “in Christ” and we are to walk by the Spirit and not by the flesh, then it stands to reason that we are in constant communication with God. He is the Master and Commander of our lives, and if we are to live as He would have us live, in His power, then we must be in constant communication with Him.
I cannot imagine deliberately sinning, or preparing to sin, and praying beforehand, can you? Prayer precludes sin. If you are tempted to sin, and someone asks you to pray, you would have to be so convicted that it would prevent you from continuing in that sin. Prayer is a preventive. Jesus said in Matt.26:41 "Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak."
And prayer is a restorative. When you sin, you have the immediate recourse to prayer and cleansing and restoration. 1John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” And furthermore, you might say that prayer is a preparative. It prepares you to walk by the Spirit, so that you will not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. It prepares you to receive the power to do the will of God.
Now Paul speaks here of a devotion to prayer. Devote can be translated to mean to continue, to persevere, to constantly engage in. It’s to have a constant attitude of prayer. 1Thess. 5:17 says, “pray without ceasing.” And Eph 6:18 says, “With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints.” We should constantly be in communication with the Lord who is the source of our life. It’s the primary speech pattern of the new life.
I think prayer is the most under appreciated aspect of the Christian life. And it’s also probably the most misunderstood. Let me clarify something else about prayer. Prayer is not speaking in tongues in an unknown language to God, where you have no idea what you have said. That makes no sense whatsoever. It’s not the Holy Spirit praying through your lips. The Holy Spirit doesn’t need your lips to communicate to the Father. Prayer must be articulate, it must be intelligent. Prayer must be meaningful. Prayer is not meaningless repetition. Jesus said in Matt. 6:7 "And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words.” So this idea that speaking in tongues is prayer to God is just not biblical. At it’s best it is meaningless repetition that means nothing to you and consequently accomplishes nothing with God.
Paul says continue or devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it. In the KJV it says keeping watch in prayer. Some theologians have said that word “watch” refers to looking for the second advent of the Lord, or the second coming of Christ. The idea of watching is sometimes associated in scripture with Jesus Christ coming back. That expectation should certainly color our lives. It should be something we expect to happen at any time. We should live in the constant expectancy and hope that today might be the day that the Lord returns.
But I don’t think that is what Paul means when he says keep alert or keep watch. I think it goes back to what Jesus said which I quoted before from Matthew 26:41 "Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." I think keep watching in prayer or keep alert in prayer is reminiscent of Peter’s admonition in 1Peter 5:8 “Be of sober [spirit,] be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” Be on the alert in prayer, because it is the Lord who will deliver you from the jaws of the lion. We don’t see the devil, but we can be on the alert for his schemes through prayer.
And our prayers to that effect should be coupled with thanksgiving, Paul says. Now that does not mean that we dutifully check off a list of things we thank God for so we can then move on to our petitions. But what it does indicate is that thankfulness precludes envy and dissatisfaction. If we remind ourselves of what we have to be thankful for, then we are less likely to find ourselves dissatisfied and grumpy about what lot our lives have been given. Even in the midst of troubles and trials and tribulations, Paul found plenty to be thankful for. Remember he is writing this epistle from prison, while in chains. And yet he starts the epistle in chapter one vs three saying, “We give thanks to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, praying always for you.” We need to cultivate an attitude of thankfulness, regardless of our immediate circumstances. So the new life should be characterized by new speech which continues in prayer.
The second attribute of speech in this new life is the speech, not of prayer, but verse 3 and 4, the speech of proclamation. “praying at the same time for us as well, that God will open up to us a door for the word, so that we may speak forth the mystery of Christ, for which I have also been imprisoned; that I may make it clear in the way I ought to speak.” Twice you see the word “speak.” Once you see the phrase, “the word.” Once you see the word “clear.” And all of those words have to do with of the speech of proclamation.
Notice that Paul says pray that God will open to us a door for the word, that we may speak forth the mystery of Christ. The mystery of Christ is simply the gospel. Our new speech in this new life should be that which speaks forth the gospel as revealed by the word. We are ministers of the word. You are ministers, not in the sense of a pastor, but in the sense of an official, an ambassador of the kingdom of God. It’s important that you know the word. It’s important that you are able to proclaim the word. To share the word.
Paul wrote something very similar in Ephesians 6:19, “Pray for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel, For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.” He says pray for me that I might be bold; pray for me that a door for the Word might be opened up. This man was aware that he had been given a mission, a ministry. He didn't ask them to pray for his personal needs. He didn't say, “Pray for me that I'll hold up under the stress.” He didn't say, “Pray for me that I get released from prison.” He just said, “Pray for me, that I'll open my mouth, and find an open door to proclaim the Word.”
The priority of this new speech is the proclamation of the gospel. That was Paul’s priority, and it should be our priority. I’m afraid that far too often though its not something we think too much about. We’re too concerned about whether or not we might offend someone. We are too concerned that it might seem awkward to talk about the gospel. But the gospel really is the most important thing in the world, that people might know how they can be made right with God and receive eternal life.
We need to pray, like Paul, that God would open a door for us to speak to our friends and loved ones concerning the gospel. To have an open door means to have an opportunity. You know, when I seek the Lord’s will concerning things I ask Him to either open or shut the door. And I can tell you that the majority of the time it seems that God shuts the door. And the way that I think God leads me is that there is only one door left that seems to be open. But then we have to walk through that door. God is not going to carry us across the threshold. But He will open a door for us to proclaim the gospel if we ask Him to.
In Revelation, chapter 3, verse 7, it says this: “To the angel of the church in Philadelphia write: These things says He that is holy, He that is true, He that has the key of David, He that opens and no man shuts; and shuts, and no man opens.” He says, “I know your works: I have set before you an open door.” God can and will open a door for us to proclaim His gospel.
Paul goes on to say in vs 4, “that I may make it clear in the way I ought to speak.” I'm afraid sometimes that a good message proclaimed in a bad way will do just about as much harm as a bad message. Paul asks for prayer that he would speak the way he should, and that he would speak it correctly, to speak the way God would have him speak about the gospel.
You know, there are a number of ways that you can speak the gospel incorrectly. I will give you four ways which it is commonly presented incorrectly. One, is the experience centered proclamation. That’s where someone gets up and tells a story of how their life was changed. They never really present the gospel, or the word of God, just the experience that happened to them, whatever that might be. And so the hearer may be drawn to have a similar experience, but he doesn’t understand what’s involved in salvation according to the word.
The second way to falsely proclaim, is what might be called an ego-centric proclamation. You appeal to their ego. To their desires. Christ can solve all your problems. Christ can heal you, restore your marriage, help you financially. And so the person responds on that basis, expecting God to solve all their problems. And so often they end up disillusioned and end up falling away because Christ didn’t deliver in the way they thought He should.
The third way can be called expedience proclamation, where all you want is some sort of commitment, regardless of what they know or don’t know. Those kinds of presentations often rely on another method, which is emotional proclamation, where the emotions are manipulated to get people to respond. The music is playing softly, the appeal is couched in some heartbreaking story, and the person starts crying, and they respond with an emotional commitment to something that they think has to do with God, but they don’t really know what happened other than they felt something or had some sort of emotional experience.
Paul says, let me speak in a way that is clear, that makes clear the truth of the gospel, and let me proclaim it as God would have me to do it. That should be our goal as well.
The third way our speech is different now that we are Christians is the new man is going to have the speech of what we might call performance. Verse 5: “Walk in wisdom toward them that are outside, redeeming the time.” Here he's talking about the speech of performance, or how you act.
Have you ever heard the saying, “Your actions are so loud I cannot hear what you are saying?” What Paul is indicating here is a lifestyle that speaks louder than your words. Walk, he says. That’s lifestyle. That’s behavior. What you do comes before what you say. People aren’t going to listen to you prattle on about the Lord if your actions are contrary to His teaching.
Paul is talking about our testimony before outsiders; meaning those outside the church. These are the unsaved. He says walk or act with wisdom towards those who are unsaved. What does he mean by wisdom? A wisdom of this world? Are we to make sure we talk in a way that is hip, that is relevant, so that the people of the world think we’re cool and they will listen to us? Are we to model the look and dress and behavior and sounds of the world so that they will accept us and then listen to us? Is that what he is saying?
It certainly seems to be the way a lot of churches today interpret this. One well known church in Chicago a number of years ago, which became a model for most of the large modern churches today, in the beginning of their ministry they sent out a questionnaire to the community, and they asked them what features that turned them off about church, and what kind of things that they would like to see in a church. And after all the responses were evaluated, they designed their church to be like what the unsaved people in the community wanted to see. They called it the seeker friendly church. And they were very popular for a while and built a mega church that became a template for hundreds of other churches to emulate. But is that walking in wisdom towards outsiders? I don’t think that is what Paul is talking about.
It simply means walking in the wisdom of the word. Colossians 1:9,“For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and desire that you might be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; That you might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing.” You have been saved, you have been given wisdom to understand the mystery of the gospel. And you need to be filled with the wisdom of godly living that you might walk in it. Wisdom is the application of knowledge. Especially in our testimony to the unsaved, we need to live lives that are a reflection of Christ. We need to apply the truth of the gospel to our daily lives. We need to live godly. We need to avoid the temptations of the world. We need to put on the behaviors which Paul enumerated in the previous chapter.
Here is walking in wisdom. Ch. 3:12-17 “So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things [put on] love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms [and] hymns [and] spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, [do] all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.” That’s walking in wisdom, and we should make sure that our lives exemplify that lifestyle to the eyes of a watching world.
Then he says, “Redeeming the time,” that’s the literal translation of the end of vs 5. What does that mean? Time there is not kronos, from which we chronology or chronograph, which means time in terms of clock time. It is kairos, which means time in terms of opportunity. It should translate “making the most of every opportunity.” Psalm 90 says “So teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts to wisdom.” It's a matter of making the most of opportunity. You know, opportunity is fleeting. Life is short. People are dying. You don’t know how much time you have. Jesus is coming soon. So make the most of the opportunity that you have to speak the truth to someone.
The Bible talks about the door being shut. The Bible talks about the night that’s coming, when no man can work. The Bible talks about Jesus removing the candlestick which is the light of the church. It’s important that we recognize that time is fleeting, and opportunity doesn’t always give us a second chance. You have today. You have the opportunity today to make sure you have said everything that can be said to your loved one or to your friend or co worker. The night is coming when no man can work.
That leads us to the fourth type of speech characteristic of the new life - the speech of perfection. Vs 6 “Let your speech always be with grace, [as though] seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.” Now this phrase, “Let your speech be always with grace.” He's talking about our general conversation. The mouth of a Christian should utter the speech of perfection. Never out of the mouth of a Christian should come that stuff that Paul listed in chapter 3: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech and lying.
But rather Paul says let your mouth speak graciousness. What is courteous, what is kind, what is tasteful. What is purposeful, what is complimenting, what is gentle, what is truthful, what is loving, what is thoughtful. Not bitter, abrasive, vindictive, sarcastic, angry, cutting, boastful, none of those things should characterize your speech. Your speech should be gracious.
Then Paul adds, “Seasoned with salt.” Not just gracious, but your speech ought to be worth something. Salt was used for money in those days. Salt was also used as a preservative to stop corruption. Salt was used to cleanse as well. So your speech should be a purifier that prevents corruption. Your speech should act as a purifying, wholesome, cleansing influence, rescuing the sinner from the corruption that is in the world.
The Greeks had another thought here. They said the idea of salt was the idea of wit. And wit is the ability to say just the right thing at just the right time. There is a saying which was penned by Shakespeare which is; “brevity is the soul of wit.” It means the essence of an effective statement lies in its concise wording and delivery.
And isn't that what Paul is saying? “That you may know how you ought to answer every man.” You've got the right answer for just the right time, and just the right person. The right word at the right time to the right person, the speech of perfection. And that perfect speech is gained through prayer, through the study of God’s word, and through practice in proclamation.
I can tell you from experience that you get better at articulating the gospel the more that you do it. The more you practice it the more comfortable you become, and the better you become at finding the right words. A lot of people are afraid of speaking to someone about the gospel because they have never done it. They’re afraid that they won’t know what to say. But the fact is that God can help you know what to say. And as you step out in faith, and are obedient to His command to be a witness, He not only will provide the help you need, but you will develop more confidence and competence as you commit yourself to doing it.
Well, thank God we have a new life in Christ. An as a result we are to have a new type of speech. Devote yourselves to prayer. Pray that a door would be opened for proclamation of the gospel. Then act in wisdom towards those who are outsiders, making the most of every opportunity. And finally, practice the speech of perfection; Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.”
May God grant us the desire to obey His will in our speech.
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